Today, with the advent of technology, our society is has become heavily focused on productivity and multi-tasking. And while at times, there’s no question technology has gifted us with extreme convenience, we’ve at the same time, become accustomed to feeling like we need to always be doing something. We’ve lost the natural comfort of idle time. Before cell phones and social media, we would have unplanned, unscheduled moments to get lost in our thoughts. We would wait in line at the grocery store, and daydream or observe our surroundings instead of checking the latest facebook post or tweet. We would sit at the table in the morning sipping our coffee, thinking about the day, processing our thoughts, instead of replying to emails. We would wake up in the morning, turn off the alarm, and lie in bed, reflecting on our dreams while we gradually wake up. Today, we reach for our phones to check the latest headline, before we even sit up.
Unbeknownst to us at the time, we had the luxury of experiencing our thoughts, distraction free. I believe we receive so much value in the simplicity of slowing down, and just being. It is in those moments, when I “unplug”, and look up, that I have my greatest awakenings. When I allow my mind to wander, and resist the habit of “doing something”, I experience more calm and greater peace. I give my mind the space it needs to sort things out – things that sometimes I didn’t even realize I needed sorting out, until they come to me. These are some of my favorite, most fulfilling moments.
I remember the first time I came to this realization. It was before cell phones and social media. I was a young teenager, and even then, we could find ways to distract ourselves with friends and activities. I was fortunate enough to move away for a period of time with my father to a remote island in the Caribbean. Every day, as my dad went to find work, I would hike a couple miles to a private beach, and spend the day there – just me, and a good book. Those moments I had, just to myself, everyday, are where I really started to know myself. I recall having epiphanies about the type of person I wanted to be, and what was important to me. I was developing my values – fundamental even to who I am today. I cherished that time away, growing, becoming a strong, independent woman with my own mind. And that time, that idle, quiet time, was what I began to long for.
As I returned home, I felt light, bright, and fresh. But it wasn’t long before I began noticing these feelings starting to fade. I became aware that I was falling back in to busy-ness. Soccer, cheerleading, dances, concerts, exams, parties…I was having a blast! And, simultaneously I was experiencing an emptiness grow inside of me. It was then that I realized I was getting lost again, caught up in all the fun activities of a teenager, but forgetting my connection with myself – forgetting who I was. That’s when I really knew it was vital for me to always make time for me. It had become a critical part of my happiness and human experience.
I went on to seek out experiences where I could experience more of myself. Often it involved travel to new places. I went on a summer program in high school to a rural town in Ecuador where I vaccinated dogs for rabies. I went back to the Caribbean each summer and spent the months wandering, exploring. I traveled around Europe in college, and spent a year studying in Spain. From there, I’ve traveled all over the world, exploring the scenery, and my own soul.
Now, when I’m home, I make it a point to slow down, no matter how busy I feel, and just be. I can get to that place inside much quicker now, it doesn’t require adventure and solitude as much. However it is required. It is required if I want to continue to grow, reconnect with myself, and experience the peace and happiness that I love. So, I do little things. I don’t reach for my phone when I’m waiting in line. I schedule an afternoon off to take a walk, and read a good book. I allow myself to daydream, look out the window, and detach from electronics. I do nothing. And in doing nothing, I always find something.
